It’s kinda ironic…

…how I go home early now that I have a car. I always thought that since I now have my own car, I could go home whenever I want to. I don’t need to think of until what time jeeps are available or if I have to change routes if there are no more jeeps at a certain time. I don’t have to be afraid every time I hail a cab to go home if I’m too drunk. Having a car means I can now go home whenever I want.

But it’s the complete opposite. Since I park inside our gated apartment, I have to be early so I could park without anyone blocking the gate. It’s such a hassle when I go home late and someone has parked in front of the gate because I have to match the car to its owner and go a flight of stairs and ask the car’s owner to move his/her car so I can park inside. I always feel like a douche whenever I hassle people over parking my car.

So I go home early. So even if I have to ask someone to move their car, it’s still early and they’re most likely awake still. Not only that, but having a car meant I also go to work earlier. Going in at 10AM doesn’t cut it anymore because I don’t have any parking space left by that time. I have to go in early.

This post has no point but to share my observation, which I find ironic. “Having a car means freedom!” Nope. Not for me. Although it is very convenient to not have to wait in line for jeeps especially when it’s raining. Or book an Uber worth two liters of gasoline, which could serve me for days if I drove my own car. I also don’t arrive to work sweaty and I can listen to the songs I want on full blast. I never thought I’d like driving (oh goodness, the anxiety and stress of learning) but I actually do. Unless it’s parking my car, which still stresses me the fuck out. But whenever I’m driving, it’s just so peaceful. I have time alone for myself, which I know I supposedly get loads of but I’m living with my sister so I don’t really have time ~alone~.

I like driving. I hope it likes me someday too. Especially parking. Haha!


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