I just realized that my blog’s header is well, 2PM. 2PM being goofy and funny and all. And I just realized that today because I’ve been too busy with school that I haven’t logged in in a while. And it rips my heart out to see 2PM these days. I can’t listen to their songs in my phone, I can’t watch the Wild Bunny episodes that I missed because I can’t stand to see Jay now, knowing that he left the group. It’s not that I’m boycotting 2PM, I love them soooo much but I can’t see them incomplete. Reading news about Jay here and there makes me cry. And I’m not exaggerating because tears are welling up right now. Thinking of Jay (and an incomplete 2PM) makes me sad, really sad. Sad that I can cry all day thinking of the good old days. I promised myself before that I’ll drain Youtube for 2PM videos but I can’t do that now even though uni gives me free time. I just can’t. Seeing Jay and the rest of 2PM so happy will make me cry because they’re not in that state anymore.
The day before Jay left 2PM is the day before my friend’s birthday. I went home, ate dinner, did some homework and opened that PC for my daily Kpop dose. When I logged in at Yahoo! Messenger, an offline message welcomed me from my friend that will celebrate her birthday tomorrow that Jay has left 2PM already. I can’t believe what she just told me so I rushed to allkpop and it dawned on me that he actually left Korea that day to go back to Seattle. I wailed. As in. I was crying while chatting with my friend. I just seemed so unreal and I don’t want to believe it. When I watched the video of him in the airport, my heart was crushed into a million pieces. His sullen face, GAH, I still remember it. I kept crying, crying that night. I slept late because I can’t stop crying. You might tell me that I’m way over the top but I love 2PM so much. That was the first heartbreak Kpop gave me. My friend told me that I can’t be sad the next day because it’s her birthday. Well, the next day, I kept my word but eventually, I can’t. I even told her that I can go on with my birthday with no gifts and greetings just to bring Jay back. If Jay will come back that they can forget greeting me on my birthday which is by the way on November 3.
Days passed and I still feel gloomy over the issue. I mean if I remember it or I read some news about it, tears start welling up in my ducts and well, I try to suppress them since crying in the jeepney will look waaay awkward.
And while reading what Jay’s father’s friend has to say yesterday, I can’t not cry. Ohmy, Jay. I miss you and the rest of 2PM. Saranghae~
It really helped that I wrote this post later and not right after the incident ’cause I’ll probably bash the netizens. Well, I don’t need to bash them now since I already did that with my friends.
Saranghae, Jay! Aja aja hwaiting!
And now, I must replace my header since this header will make me cry every time I see my blog. But what should I put as replacement? Gah. I have nothing in my PC but 2PM headies. XC